People Pleasing & Upholding Boundaries | Your Energetic Balance Sheet | Winter Solstice & New Moon

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The time of recording episode 531 of Soul Elevation was a powerful energetic window. Between the Winter Solstice, the New Moon, and this natural seasonal pause, there is an invitation to slow down, reflect, and become more aware of how we are living and where our energy is going.

In this episode, I speak about something that affects so many people on a deep level, often without them even realizing it. People pleasing, boundaries, and the energetic cost of over giving.

As spiritual beings in human bodies, we are constantly exchanging energy with our environment. This includes the spaces we occupy, the work we do, and especially the people we interact with. Every conversation, relationship, and commitment involves an energetic exchange.

When we fall into people pleasing patterns, we tend to give far more energy than we receive. Over time, this creates imbalance. That imbalance does not just show up emotionally. It eventually shows up physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Energy Exchange Is Real

I recently read a book written by a dear friend, Kelycya G. Gyldanyro, called Money Is a Verb. Although her background is in finance, the way she explains energy and emotions through the lens of a balance sheet really landed for me.

From a financial perspective, you have income minus expenses, and what remains determines your stability or depletion. The same thing happens energetically.

If you are constantly giving your time, attention, emotional labor, and creative energy without receiving nourishment or reciprocity, you eventually run at a deficit. This is not sustainable. It leads to exhaustion, resentment, illness, and a life that feels misaligned.

You are not here to churn through to do lists or live in constant servitude. You are here to experience life, joy, creativity, and meaningful connection.

People pleasing often comes from a desire to be kind, helpful, or accepted. But when it becomes a pattern of self abandonment, it creates energetic leakage.

I shared a personal example from my work as a podcast host. From time to time, I receive messages from people who want something from me, such as appearances, promotion of their product, introductions to those in my network, or other opportunities. Often, these requests come without any awareness of the energy and time required to fulfill them, or any acknowledgment of reciprocity.

Every guest I bring onto the show is an investment of my time, my creative energy, and even my nervous system. Preparation, recording, editing, artwork, and publishing are all done by me. Saying yes always costs something energetically. I have learned to be mindful of the various costs of production of each episode - yes, in terms of money, but equally importantly with my energy and time.

When someone approaches with a list of requests and no consideration for balance, it becomes clear there is an opportunity for them to siphon. It is up to me to be aware of my own energetic balance sheet and manage it appropriately.

Boundaries Are a Spiritual Practice

Another experience that shaped my understanding of boundaries came from my time in the corporate world. I remember listening to an executive speak about her decision to work part time. She noticed that meetings kept being scheduled on her day off, and she kept attending them.

Then she realized something important: by continuing to show up, she was teaching others that her boundaries did not matter.

Once she began declining those meetings and offering alternatives that respected her time, the behavior shifted. She had to embody her own self respect for others to subconsciously change their patterns and become more considerate of her schedule. 

This is a powerful reminder. It is not someone else’s responsibility to protect your energy. It is yours alone.

Boundaries are not rigid rules. They are living agreements with yourself. They require clarity, honesty, and the willingness to honor your own worth.

Winter Solstice and the Permission to Rest

The Winter Solstice is a natural time of dormancy and restoration, especially for those in the northern hemisphere. Nature slows down. Growth happens underground. There is less outward movement and more inward recalibration.

If you are feeling less motivated, less inspired, or more withdrawn right now, you are aligning with the rhythm of the Earth.

This season invites us to replenish rather than push, to reflect rather than produce and to listen rather than perform.

Honoring this rhythm is also a form of energetic boundary setting.

Energy exchange does not always involve money. Sometimes it looks like mutual support, collaboration, presence, or amplification. What matters is balance. It may not be perfect.

Ask yourself how a relationship or commitment leaves you feeling. Energized or depleted? Nourished or drained? Seen or invisible?

Your energy is sacred. Your time is precious. And your well being matters. When you honor your boundaries, you are being sovereign. not selfish. 

Thank you so much for being here and for sharing your presence and energy with me. I wish you a deeply nourishing season of restoration.